Monday, January 23, 2012

How much longer until bedtime?

There is not enough caffiene in the world to keep me awake right now. The little Monster was sick last night and we were literally up every 5 minutes for bathroom trips. Fast forward to 2:30 AM and me cleaning projectile vomit off of, well, everything. And he decided to be an early-riser this morning... *Yawn*

I've been going through my old Photobucket account for the better part of the day. I came across all of these old graphics I had made for me. "Mr. & Mrs. X, Est. 2007". "Splenda & Super Woman, living our fairytale"... And there were many, many, more where those came from. *Gag* Thank God I'm past the point of setbacks. There was a time when seeing those would have ruined my whole day. Times when I would have been reduced to rocking back and forth in the shower sucking my thumb. "Fairytale", huh?? Little did I know that my knight in shining armor would turn out to be a jerk in aluminum foil. But, hey, I'm living and I'm learning. That's what really counts, right? (Besides, the glass slippers were starting to hurt. The cape I traded them for is much more comfortable)

And anyway, I really should thank him. If it wasn't for him, I never would have begun this path to Self-Discovery in the first place. I shouldn't even concern myself with him at all. As long as he isn't doing something to poison my child's mind or well-being, that is. (Plus, the guy is over 2 ,000 miles away... Unless he drops in for one of his ridiculously long visits and stays so long I consider checking myself in to a Psych Ward) Any amount of ugliness he  dumped on me will get turned right back around on him. I spent a lot of time feeling like nothing, all because of mean words and selfish, cruel actions done to me. Eleanore Roosevelt said "No one can make you feel inferior without your consent"... Guess what I'm learning?

Something I want to do is inspire hope in other people. Regardless of the situation they're going through. I've had enough of being sad, and I'm willing to bet there are a lot of others out there who feel the same way.

In case you don't hear it often enough, you're beautiful <3

1 comment:

  1. I love this! We're going through the same non sense at the same exact time. I'm so glad that someone else knows what I'm feeling and going through, even if we don't talk regularly. I love you guys. You're doing an amazing job raising TJ. You're seriously just a couple of miles from me now. Don't hesitate to call if you need to get out for a few or a one on one vent session.